Loan Request

This week’s episode gives us a little insight into my sister-in-law…my wife’s older sister. She’s the one who doesn’t know how much a stamp costs. She has a long and troubled past. We’ll get into a lot more details later. She’s in and out of jobs, and can’t seem to get along with anyone long enough to start into anything even remotely resembling a career. She is also the one who quit her job at Lonestar in dramatic fashion.

I know her the best, so I seem to have more stories. One day, we were at some kind of family function and she cornered me in the kitchen, alone, and asked me for a loan (that sounded weird…alone…a loan…anyway). Most of my career has been spent working at a bank, so, usually when someone asks me for a loan, my brain automatically kicks into banking mode, and I start in with my questions, so here's how it went. Sister-in-law asked me for a loan. Okay. Question #1: How much do you need? Answer: About $3,000. Question #2. What's the collateral [ie - What do I get to take away from you when you don't pay me back?]. Answer: I really don't have any collateral. Alright…not so good, but stranger loans have been approved. Question #3: What would you use the money for? Answer: Um, its for, um, an operation... Question #4: What kind of operatio..ohmygosh...[screech]...back up! Then it hits me...she's asking me to finance her breast augmentation! I quick said 'no' to that, and explained an unsecured loan for 3 grand is probably a Visa card, not a loan from my Bank. (I could just see myself taking that loan into Senior Loan Committee for approval…”to the esteemed members of the committee, here we have a loan request for $3,000 to a barely employed woman who would like to “enhance” her physical appearance…”). She gave up on asking me for money and ended up getting her new boobs paid for by grandma, so all is well. Gotta love her persistence….and kinda got to feel sorry for her humiliation, what with having to ask TWO people (at least) for money to pay for her enhancements.